Woodbury Reports, Inc.
Bonners Ferry, ID

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Searching For Real Self-Esteem

On today's Parent Choices for Struggling Teens LA talk radio show with Lon Woodbury and his co-host, Liz McGhee, guest Jason Wynkoop, the Clinical Director for EDGE Learning and Wellness Collegiate Community, a college transition program for young adults who struggle with academics and social skills, spoke about the difficulty our children are having in developing an accurate self-concept. There tends to be a culturally driven fear of harming our kids and young adults "self-esteem" that has infiltrated families, schools and other important institutions. These well-meaning parents are "bubble wrapping" their kids to protect and build their self-esteem in ways that are falling short, by praising them for non-specific reasons, these kids are unrealistically thinking they are good at everything and better than anyone else. "When everyone is praised equally, these kids are not learning what they are good at and what they're not good at. It doesn't teach the lessons learned if they get a trophy for just participating. Therefore, they are not prepared for the real world where they may have to struggle with things they can't do well and they don't know how to cope with failure."

"Students must earn self-esteem through error and success. Yet parents are stepping in and shielding their children from negative feelings like sadness, guilt and grief, causing harm to their child's development by overprotecting them and praising them with accolades. Often these kids have linked their identity to this "great" thing they say they can do and when they fail or see others that are doing the same things-yet even better than them, they then doubt everything they have done. Our students are afraid to fail and therefore will not even try something new because of this fear of failing.

At EDGE, we ask the parents to look at the true skills their child has and ask themselves "when did you step in to save your child?" Parents need to guide and support their children and here we try to help the parents and students to have a good successful life. For students, that means being able to provide for themselves and to have fun and take risks. A healthy value system we work with is self-concept: Learning that they may be good at some stuff and to be motivated to get even better. They learn to look at failure as helpful and 'take ownership over both these successes and failures and use them as a platform for learning new skills; to take a look at their true abilities and build and work on those."

To listen to the full interview, go to Searching For Real Self-Esteem on LATalkRadio.
Also available in Podcast

Lon Woodbury is the owner/founder of Woodbury Reports, Inc. and www.strugglingteens.com. He has worked with families and struggling teens since 1984 and is the host of Parent Choices for Struggling Teens.

Elizabeth McGhee is the Director of Admissions and Referral Relations at Sandhill Child Development Center and has over 19 years' of clinical, consulting and referral relations experience to her position and is the co-host.

Jason Wynkoop, LCSW is the Clinical Director for EDGE Learning and Wellness Collegiate Community in Chicago. He has a master's in Social Work from the University of Chicago and has worked with children, adolescents, adults and families in schools and therapeutic stings for over 15 years.

This show was sponsored by Father Flanagan's Boys Town in Nebraska. 402-990-5371 www.boystown.org DougCzyz@boystown.org

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We are excited to announce that we have several openings for on-air sponsorship during our show on LA TALK Radio: Parent Choices for Struggling Teens. If you are interested in reserving some air time to promote your school, program or services, contact Kristie Campbell at kristie@woodbury.com or 208-267-5550

If you know somebody (including yourself) who would make a good guest on our show and might be interested, contact Lon at lonwoodbury@gmail.com or 208-267-5550.

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Attention:

The following books are available on Amazon.com:

Part 1 - The Introduction to the Parent Empowerment Handbook

Part 2 - Single Sex Schools

Part 3 - Wilderness Therapy and Outdoor Education