Woodbury Reports, Inc.
Bonners Ferry, ID

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Who Am I? Our Voyage of Self-Discovery

May 20, 2013

Whether it is a spiritual question or just an element of being human, today's guest on Parent Choices for Struggling Teens, Randy Russell, spoke with Lon Woodbury about this age old question and the impact of how we live. Having the answer to this question tends to be the trigger for the progress through human developmental phases or can be the block that keeps us stuck in non-progressive patterns.

Randy explained that a young person doesn't ask "who they are" until their first major life switch, around middle school age, and even then, it is more of a social question at this point. When a young person reaches the age of 19-25, this is the time in which they realize they need to be independent and need to figure out how they are going to survive. This is also the when asking "Who am I?" is no longer a social question. Therefore this becomes the trigger of asking how I am going to become self-sustaining. "The next time this question comes up is when you are a parent and your child starts asking themselves this question."

This is when the parent's role must change, when parents are no longer the 'manager' of their child's life, but rather take on the role as a 'consultant'. From birth to 5, a child knows who they are…a member of the family; from ages 5 thru early teen, kids need a place to play, to be imaginative with nature and have the freedom to explore and from 15 on through young adulthood, is when a child needs the "community" to help. This can be aunts and uncles, churches and youth groups or other mentors who can step in. As in Native American culture, this was the time in which the village elders would step in to help raise the young person, utilizing nature as a teacher as well. A young person would go on a "Vision Quest" for three to four days seeking to answer the question of who they are and this would become their 'rite of passage'. "The use of nature awakens your awareness," explained Randy. "You have to know nature to understand your inner nature."

"Without asking or exploring the question of "who am I", your development is stalled and then you become stuck. There are individuals, 30 to 50 years old that have never gone through this transition and have never asked themselves the question of who they are, either by being afraid to go through it or by not even asking the question. Nowadays we call it 'mid-life crises. Transformation needs to happen."

To listen to the full interview, go to Who Am I? Our Voyage of Self-Discovery on LATalkRadio.
Also available in Podcast

Lon Woodbury is the owner/founder of Woodbury Reports, Inc. and www.strugglingteens.com. He has worked with families and struggling teens since 1984 and is the host of Parent Choices for Struggling Teens.

Randy Russell is the Director and co-founder of InnerPathWorks, a college level leadership training program that inspires and redirects young adults who are struggling with finding direction and purpose. Randy and his wife Colleen, also offer a parent workshop for Launching Young Adults, every other month. Randy has been helping individuals transition through life passages and assisted families launch their adult children for over 40 years. He has designed and directed four different young adult leadership and transition programs and is currently the co-director of Soulful Passages.