Bully Proofing You!

The dictionary defines a bully as "a person who is habitually cruel or overbearing especially to smaller or weaker people, to force one's way in an aggressive or intimidating manner." And when a person is repeatedly bullied over a period of time, how they handle the incident will determine whether it can have a harmful effect on them that can last a lifetime. With today's guest on K4HD.com- "The Woodbury Report", Jeanie Cisco-Meth, the author of "Bully Proofing You" joined host Lon Woodbury to talk about her book and how her own personal attacks by bullies prompted her to write this self-help book and to share her secrets for bully proofing your life and how to take the initiative to build your self-character, to prevent and deal with bullying and how to deal with bullies face to face�often a terrifying thing to do.

A bully comes in all shapes and sizes, sexes and religions and ages. A bully sees a target that they think is weaker or in some cases, they think the person is better off than themselves. A bully is in pain and they need to inflict their pain on someone else. The worst kind of bully to deal with is one that you are intimidated by and fear makes you "freeze up". So, the trick is to redirect the fear mode by practicing being afraid- face your phobias. Start small and move through them. The first step to conquering your fears and your bullies is to get confidence in yourself and set your own value of yourself. When you believe in yourself, bullying can still hurt, but it will not create lasting devastation. You need to choose to believe in yourself, to know that you are valuable and that it doesn't' matter what anyone else says! The second step is to keep saying to yourself the positive feedback that people in your life are saying to you right now. Find references in your life and believe them, listen for them and be aware of those positive things. Third step, be mindful of the bully in "your own mind", be careful of what you say to yourself and don't let people talk bad to you.

The days of playground bullies has changed, especially with the Internet and social media. Jeanie's advice to this form of bullying is to stop reading it! Turn it off, don't let it feed a horrible negative self-concept. You can just delete it, and that makes it the easiest form of bullying to deal with. When it comes to rumors, you know they are not true. Just because someone says it doesn't mean it's true.

Schools need to be more sensitive to what's going on, and often they don't want to admit they have a problem. They need to recognize the problem of bullying and be pro-active and take action. "Middle school is the number one place for bullying. These kids need to let someone know when they are being bullied. This allows the adults to intervene and help you and help the other person too." Left unsaid, bullying can escalate from snide comments and intimidating body language, to daily verbal assaults to physical confrontations of pushing and shoving, to then getting their friends involved in the bullying. It just gets worse.

Another step a child can take is to get a friend and then practice what you are going to say to the bully when confronted next time. Write down the comments the bully says to you and practice your comebacks. These can be "canned responses or one liners". Practice until they roll off your tongue with ease. This helps build the positive mental attitude and allows you to role play your responses to a bully."

Learn more about "Bully Proofing You" at:
Jeanie Cisco-Meth
801-735-5746
jeanie@jeanieciscometh.com
www.bullyproofingyou.com

Listen to the full interview here: Bully Proofing You!
Also available in Podcast

Please join us every Tuesday on "The Woodbury Report" at k4hd.com - hosted by Lon Woodbury live at 12:00 noon- PST.